ANONYMOUS QUOTES V

Sometimes when you think the storm is coming to rain on your parade, it's actually there to water your garden.

ANONYMOUS

Tags: rain, gardens


Life has never given me lemons. It has given me anger issues, anxiety, a love for alcohol and a serious dislike for stupid people. But not lemons.

ANONYMOUS

Tags: humorous quotes


I'm a nervous flyer, and it doesn't make it any easier when I get to the airport and see the sign TERMINAL.

ANONYMOUS

Tags: aviation


Dear sleep, I know we had problems when I was younger ... but I love you now.

ANONYMOUS

Tags: sleep


The hurrier I go, the behinder I get.

ANONYMOUS

Tags: haste


Everyone is a reader.... Some just haven't found their book yet.

ANONYMOUS

Tags: reading


During sex it's perfectly fine to say "YEAH", "YES", and "OH YES", but how awkward would it be if someone kept screaming "YEP"?

ANONYMOUS

Tags: sex


You'll never find a rainbow if you're staring at your feet.

ANONYMOUS

Tags: pessimism


Reputation is made in a moment. Character is built in a lifetime.

ANONYMOUS

Tags: character


Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.

ANONYMOUS


My wife told me to stop impersonating a flamingo. I had to put my foot down.

ANONYMOUS

Tags: funny quotes


Anger is a condition in which the tongue works faster than the mind.

ANONYMOUS

Tags: anger


Your body is a temple, but how long can you live in the same house before you redecorate.

ANONYMOUS


My only hobby is laziness, which naturally rules out all others.

ANONYMOUS

Tags: hobbies


If hindsight of some women was as good as their foresight, they wouldn't be wearing slacks.

ANONYMOUS


Hockey players wear numbers because you can't always identify the body with dental records.

ANONYMOUS

Tags: hockey


A teenager is someone who is well prepared for a zombie attack but not ready for tomorrow's math test.

ANONYMOUS

Tags: teenagers


Retirement: World's longest coffee break.

ANONYMOUS


My alarm tells me you're in my house. My gun tells me not for long.

ANONYMOUS

Tags: guns


Don't worry about people who don't worry about you.

ANONYMOUS

Tags: worry